Next Chelsea boss? It's got to be Roby!

Di Matteo replaced Villas-Boas as caretaker boss

The identity of Chelsea's next boss is staring out under the noses of the billionaire Russian and his tubby apparatchiks. Roberto Di Matteo's lifted the team out of lethargy to the outer perimeter of glory - and he'd be my choice for the hotseat.

Yet Roman Abramovich always opts for the coach with the prevailing wind of hype under his wings - and what does he do with this hot air? He acts on it. Granted the Siberian got it spectacularly right with Jose Mourinho and Carlo Ancelotti (and hopelessly wrong when he sacked them both) - but what of the rest?

Grandad Scolari was hired merely because he put England to the sword thrice with Brazil and Portugal. His command of English made Fabio Capello sound like Brian Blessed. Ray Wilkins fronted the media for most of his tenure and when the former Kuwait chief did plop out a few words, he'd not bothered to find out how Chelsea was pronounced!


But quarter-English Baron Villas-Boas, with a full eighteen months management under his belt (fresh from a league and Europa double with Porto), got the nodski because his youth and career path resembled that of the Special One.

Sleeping Booted. So inappropriate for Chelsea

Could Roman make the same mistake again and launch an audacious bid for Pep Guardiola and his like? If so, then taking the Barca boss out of his comfort zone offers no guarantee of Champions League glory down Fulham Broadway anytime soon.



No, Chelsea must appoint Roberto Di Matteo. Iconic scorer of famous Blues goals as a player, he's clearly a man who cares not just for the club but also for the playing group too. Recall his riproaring celebration at the final whistle of Chelsea's Champions League triumph over Napoli. He nearly decapitated Fernando Torres as he sauntered off the pitch, jumping on the Spaniard's back like he was playing the joker in It's a Knockout.

He even got a bear hug from Frank Lampard, a clinch not employed since proposing to Christine Bleakley in the summer.

"Sacked mid-season at West Bromwich Albion!", I hear the cries. That counts for little. The spin should be that he has managed in the Premier League more to the point.

And remember, Rafa Benitez was sacked by Real Valladolid and Osasuna before tasting European success at Valencia and Liverpool. Alex Ferguson was dismissed by St. Mirren in his second job. Whatever happened to him?

Di Matteo's not ruling himself either, although sensibly he only wants to talk about "winning games in a results business". A down-to-earth approach that puts him in good stead for getting the job permanently.

Fergie and Rafa were both sacked early in their careers

Di Matteo's also played recently. He has the respect of the senior players and critically, they play for him. The Chelsea board need to apply completely different criterion and one of them is to get off their high-horse and stop buying the equivalents of a Rolex Daytona.

Think Swatch, Roman! Give it to a man who'd live and breathe Chelsea. Give it to Roby.

Also on Soccermongery: Villas-Boas chewed and spat out by Chelsea and John Terry court verdict will prove a snapshot of our society's health.

  

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Terry's tears, tantrums and takeaways

In response to our previous article, Soccermongery's been handed some interesting background on John Terry: his near switch to Manchester City, antics with England and his remarkable rise to the top of the Stamford Bridge order.

From reliable sources who've asked not be named, we learn:

Football's hard man was in tears as Fabio Capello axed him as England skipper inside three minutes of the twelve-minute showdown.

Capello's big punishment is in keeping with his stringent England regime. So strict, Terry's ordered Chinese takeaways from outside the confines of the team's posh hotel!

On England duty at The Grove, Terry complained the Italian was feeding them with meal after meal of "rabbit food", so he phoned for Chinese for fourteen of the squad. The huge load was shuttled through a backdoor away from management view!

As far as his private life goes, the Vanessa Perroncel incident is the tip of the iceberg. Terry's well-known for back of the car trysts - but it's also claimed he had sex in a night club toilet with a girl on crutches.

Terry's persistent philandering has much to do with unhappiness in his marriage to Toni, described as "like a character from EastEnders" and "fifty times worse than Posh Spice"!

But behaviour in the bedroom seems akin to his reactions to the boardroom.

As Terry strung out transfer negotiations with Manchester City, Chelsea forced him to get rid of his agent of fifteen years in exchange for succumbing to his demands. Roman Abramovich matched the staggering offer from oil rich Eastlands. Aaron Lincoln brokered the deal under orders from Terry but was then unceremoniously dumped.

The transfer was negotiated during the close-season and the catalyst was the departure of Jose Mourinho from Stamford Bridge.

Terry loved Mourinho and hated Abramovich for sacking him. When The Special One left after an inauspicious Champions League draw against little Rosenborg, the Portugeezer told Terry his demise was down to a clash of egos. The quiet Russian billionaire couldn't live with Mourinho's raffish, high-profile demeanour. Roman wanted to be the Bridge Boss - and showed it.

Chelsea's captain was in pieces and wanted to leave. Scolari's dressing room was a mess, so Terry ordered Lincoln to find him a move away. Alarmed by how upset Terry was, Lincoln pleaded with Terry to think about it for a week, and if he still felt the same to let him know. Would he really want to give up the fans, the London scene and the legendary status he'd already earned at the club? A Chelsea man through and through, Lincoln didn't want to be the man who sold Terry - unless his client really wanted out.

City got wind and the new owners heard rumours of how unsettled he'd been. A salary of £250k a week with a £50m transfer tag was set in motion. Terry shook hands with the Sheikhs but Abramovich countered with a deal to match City's offer - on condition that he waved goodbye to his agent.

Terry had been on a week's holiday in the US and phoned Lincoln to let him know his services were no longer required. Lincoln was gutted. He'd been made to look like stupid with both the City owners and Chelsea.

Lincoln was more than just Terry's commercial man. He was also the ex-England captain's eyes and ears keeping him on the straight and narrow and out of the media glare - even handling Terry's family's misdemeanours. His relationship with Terry even survived Lincoln being blacklisted as an agent by the FA.

The loss of such a close confidante has led directly to Terry's downfall. Instead of Lincoln's guiding hand, Terry's now managed by two close friends who've failed to protect him from the pressures of being a top footballer.

Wayne Bridge's switch to City had nothing to do with his relationship breakdown with Vanessa Perroncel or Terry. He left Chelsea for footballing reasons knowing he was playing second fiddle to Ashley Cole. Bridge actually feels sorry Terry got involved with his ex-girlfriend. The relationship between Perroncel and the England left-back was beyond reconciliation long before the Terry dalliance became public.

Bridge was also represented by Lincoln in the past.

When Terry was 15, Alex Ferguson rejected him and Tottenham didn't fancy him either. Even as a Chelsea youngster, he was deemed to be "too small" but Lincoln fought for him.

Terry's Chelsea opportunity came unexpectedly over a fight between two teammates. We're told Dennis Wise decked Michael Duberry over the sacking of Ruud Gullit. When Wise assumed temporary control of the team, young Terry was suddenly thrust into the first team under Wise's orders. Duberry joined Leeds in weeks.

Terry's rise up the Chelsea tree was nearly ended when then Huddersfield boss Steve Bruce had a mere £750k offer ACCEPTED by Chelsea. Terry turned down the move.

Soccermongery has no angle but as a fan of truth. Terry's lucky in life and it seems his luck's far from run out.

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Sven says no to North Korea!

In a first notable act of ethical foreign policy, Sven-Goran Eriksson's rejected the chance to manage North Korea. A wise decision especially as his Korea is in fact going south (boom boom!)

But it's not to appease the Neocons and Hawks up Washington. Sven's decision to reject the Axis of Evil has more to do with his almost OCD approach to job offers. Soccermongery can exclusively reveal he's going through the alphabet accepting them!

Since leaving the FA, Sven's taken on Manchester City, Mexico, Notts County and er... North Korea? (no, it's on the previous page, Sven - but an easy mistake to make!).

You can therefore fully expect approaches to Nuneaton Town, Oxhey Jets, then Paraguay. STOP PRESS: Sweden have come calling!

Let's face it, Sven's snaffling up contracts coining it in off the back of being world famous in football. Remember the job he nearly accepted after the World Cup, Jamaica? no he left of his own accord!

Sven's got his eye on the money and doesn't give a hoot about where the job is - so long as the chances are he'll get paid!

And the more these old boys throw the dice in the autumn of their careers, the bigger the chance they'll get of grabbing a serious job sooner or later.

Don't believe me? journeyman Luiz Felipe Scolari got Chelsea after errant assignments at whothefcukin'ellaretheyclubs like Al Qadisiya, Criciúma, Grêmio and Júbilo Iwata. It seemed his only qualification was being in charge of teams who knocked England out of major tournaments every other year.

And he got found out!

Sven's a mere twelve months away from a possible return to Manchester City, the hotseat at Portsmouth or maybe Jose's replacement at Inter. North Korea's not good enough? Don't worry Svennis, like the buses another myopic club or country will be a long in fifteen minutes! STOP PRESS: Sweden haven't disappointed us. They've come calling for the old boy. Told you!

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Chelsea need to show they're grown up enough for Ancelotti

So Carlo Ancelotti becomes the latest stellar name from club management to try to Turn The World Blue.

It's a mighty big shout for Ancelotti to have quit Milan to go anywhere: he's a four-time European Cup winner with il Rossoneri, twice as a player and twice as manager. Chelsea need to respect that decision.

Big names come and go with sublime regularity at the Bridge, but even Chelsea must realise that Ancelotti's arrival coupled with John Terry's renewed commitment is a shot in the arm for their title fortunes. Manchester United have won the last three and the Blues are lagging.

For a Superclub, Chelsea consume coaches at an alarming rate: Mourinho, Grant, Sid James and Hiddink? no wonder the Dutchman never considered staying. He's the only coach to leave in a blaze of glory since Roman lavished his multi-millions on the club.

The other Big 3 in England do nothing of the sort; there's no bloodletting in the Manager's Office elsewhere: Fergie at OT, 23 years and counting, Benitez' Anfield tenure looks stronger than ever and Wenger leaving the Emirates would be akin to the Ravens leaving The Tower!

It's time Chelsea stopped it too. Ancelotti created an amazing one-off set-up at Milan. thirty-something world-class players, who continually performed in Europe and domestically. No wonder David Beckham made a beeline to the San Siro, it's THE club for a 34-year-old hard worker.

There's a temptation to lose patience with the manager when the going gets tough at Stamford Bridge. This time the board needs patience with Ancelotti, who's a Project Manager in the class of Sir Alex Ferguson.

Chelsea should stop measuring themselves against the teams above them, and believe that with Ancelotti, the right man for the job, that he will bring the trophies home.

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Liverpool to Chelsea, Manchester United to Spurs, West Brom to Stoke - who'd be a manager?

By JOE MORRIS.

Football is full of half-finished sentences and unanswered questions. There are times when the Premier League would just love a full stop - even a punctuation mark. When a referee allows a dodgy goal or a player loses his rag, it is best to leave things hanging in the air.

Take for instance the FA Cup fourth-round replay between Liverpool and Everton. With minutes to go in the match and the game finely balanced, Everton launched one final attack. ITV viewers were then treated to the bizarre spectacle of an advert break at the wrong time. Now we all know about the importance of timing in sport but this was rather like interrupting Gilbert and Sullivan with the Coldstream Guards. Totally inappropriate, you might say.

At the top of the Premier League, managers are frequently questioned for both their timing and behaviour. Only a couple of weeks ago Liverpool manager Rafa Benitez put his ugliest foot in it with an inflammatory remark about Manchester United boss Sir Alex Ferguson and vice versa. Apparently Fergie thought the time was ripe for a spot of verbal jousting.

Now the story so far is that Liverpool have made their Premier League title bid emphatically clear and Fergie, of course, is quite clearly on the warpath. Sir Alex, as many of us know, is renowned for his cunning mind games but for Benitez this had gone far enough. Ferguson apparently made a childishly spiteful remark about the wisdom of signing Robbie Keane and Benitez took immediate offence.

It was at this point that the gloves went on, Fergie spat out his chewing gum and the air became blue with good old-fashioned Anglo Saxon fury. When Sir Alex Ferguson buttons up his black coat and gums up for the afternoon, it is safe to assume that all animals are safely protected. He shoves his hands in his pockets, gazes threateningly at the referee and then considers legal action.

Both Ferguson and Benitez are classic examples of men with a proverbial chip on the shoulder. It would be unfair to say that both men suffer from a persecution complex. But when the tension reaches boiling point and the stakes are at their highest, both seem to revert to a frustrated childhood. The accusations fly, and both end up in tears.

To all outward apperances, Benitez has been the calm and rational one who would rather keep out of the limelight. He stands on the touchline in the warmest of tracksuits, pointing and gesturing at his players and then shuffling his shoes. Benitez may look as if he's waiting for a bus but then Liverpool have been waiting 19 years for a League title so impatience is perfectly understandable.

Behind the pacesetters are Aston Villa and Martin O'Neill. For Villa a place in the top four is new territory this decade so O'Neill does seem to be gate-crashing the party. At no point during any Premier League match does the Villa manager seem to stand still or sit down.

He nervously twitches on the balls of his feet, a picture of anxiety and curiosity. When Villa score and the crowd explode, O'Neill jumps 4 feet into the air in celebration, punches his fists with delight and then just congratulates himself.

For Luiz Felipe Scolari, the world according to Chelsea proved a deeply unpleasant one. He was never the tormented and anguished Jose Mourinho where every match was a horrible ordeal. Whereas Mourinho seemed to hate everybody and everything, Senor Scolari was a smouldering Brazilian volcano ready to blow. In the heat of action he became cold and emotionless, only letting himself go when Frank Lampard crossed the half-way line.

At the other end of the Premier League, life for new Spurs boss Harry Redknapp is all worry and restless animation. From the moment happy Harry, formerly of Portsmouth and West Ham, walked into White Hart Lane, every day has come with a government health warning. In his thickly padded top, Redknapp often looks as though he's being tortured with red-hot pokers. He throws his head to one side when things go wrong, flings his hands in front of his face in utter exasperation and then asks his wife to play up front.

Last but not least, there are the men who just fold their arms, hoping and waiting for something to turn up. Tony Pulis is the helpless manager of Stoke City, baseball cap on his head, smart and upright and yet resigned to his fate. Perhaps Stoke will be relegated or maybe they won't.

There is the immaculately shirt-and-tied Tony Mowbray, who probably wishes he hadn't been offered the West Brom job. Mowbray looks like a grim trade unionist who only smiles on a Tuesday afternoon.

There you have it, then. Premier League bosses really do have to suffer for their art. When the whistle goes and players kick off, theirs is the kind of job only the foolish and deluded would take.

It is undoubtedly one of the most thankless and unenviable jobs of all. It is 90 minutes of joy, heartbreak, endless toil and drudgery. When the pressure reaches its most intense and the wealthy chairmen demand their ounce of flesh and blood, it is quite simply no place for the faint hearted.
Anyone for tennis?

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Scolari made Grant's time at Chelsea look good

There's no patience at Stamford Bridge even for a World Cup winning boss. Luiz Felipe Scolari is gone and Chelsea will have their third manager inside a year-and-a-half. But Big Phil was always a riskier appointment than his CV suggested.

Chelsea were intoxicated by Scolari's status. Roman Abramovich was bedazzled by the man who said no to the FA, who put England to the sword in three consecutive tournaments and who won the World Cup.

But for years, he was accustomed only to the comparatively part-time tasks of international management with Brazil and Portugal. Suddenly at a senior age, thrust into the day-to-day stresses of a domestic club in the toughest league in the world, Scolari couldn't handle it.

You can see the toll Chelsea took on Big Phil. On the left, a picture of him with Portugal - and on the right, in the Chelsea cauldron.

He suffered with kidney stones, speaking English like a Mind Your Language student, he got Ray Wilkins to face the media spotlight when it intensified and Chelsea slithered from odds-on title favourites to the ignominy of battling for the final Champions League place.

So who next at the Bridge? And how short-sighted does Jose Mourinho's dismissal as manager look now?

The fact is that only someone like Mourinho will do for Chelsea. Young, thrusting, dynamic, energetic and with medals in his pocket at another top European side.

Perhaps not this time, but Gianfranco Zola of West Ham is a man who must manage Chelsea one day. Already establishing his credentials in double quick time at Upton Park, his master stroke was appointing Steve Clarke as Hammers coach; the only man who has a bigger reputation at Chelsea than the wee Sardinian does.

Clarke is widely acknowledged as the mastermind behind organising Chelsea from back-to-front and many will point to the Blues demise and Hammers ascendancy being exactly measured by his move across town.

As they say in politics, Zola and Clarke are the dream ticket, but perhaps the timing isn't right for either Chelsea or the Hammers duo.

Perhaps Guus Hiddink is the man with the all-round experience to steer the Blue ship, although like Scolari, is he ready for the gear change from international to club football?

It's ironic that Avram Grant could well be on his way back to the Premier League with Portsmouth on the day the Chelsea job became available again.

Also on Soccermongery: Cock-up Charlton had Hodgson in their sights.

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Sorry Geordies: Keegan's exit is a positive for Newcastle United!

I know this is unpalatable to Toon fans but Kevin Keegan is a proven loser and totally ill-equipped to lead a Premier League team in the 21st century. Newcastle, you're best off without him. The next thing for the Toon to pray for is a Manchester City-style change of ownership and rid themselves of Oyk Ashley too.

It's time for Newcastle United to extricate itself from the past. The last time Kevin Keegan led Newcastle to (near) glory in the 90's, he was merely pitted against Arsenal's Bruce Rioch, Liverpool's Roy Evans and Chelsea's Ruud Gullit.

Who beat Keegan to the title? the ultimate football winner, Alex Ferguson. Aside from the total one-off that is The Govanor, the game's moved on.

Now Arsenal are led by Arsene Wenger, at Liverpool it's Rafa Benitez, Chelsea have a World Cup winner in the shape of Big Phil and it's still SIR Alex Ferguson of United. Then there's Martin O'Neill at Villa and Tottenham's Juande Ramos. Keegan can't hold a candle to any of them.

"We cannot possibly understand the fabled north-east football mentality", we're told as outsiders.

It's that mentality which propels Kevin Keegan to its summit as some sort of messiah. A romantic figure, a Pied Piper leading Newcastle to Wembley wins and open-top bus celebrations around Sid James' Park.

WAKE UP!! If Newcastle played Blyth Spartans, Hartlepool(s) and Darlington every week, the north-east mentality would be all that was required. But Newcastle doesn't operate in isolation.

In fact, the fabled north-east mentality comes off the rails every time its pitted against the north-west mentality; clubs from there win big pots every year - and have done so for 50 years.

Keegan was never the man to lead Newcastle out of the mire. Even with a supportive Geordie board rather than Ashley, he'd have found a way to quit.

Not that Ashley's any better. He's even worse to be honest; he has a track record of division and riding roughshod over anyone in his way.

Newcastle need a strong man the fans recognise and who they'd get behind - BUT someone without the baggage of a triumphant return. Someone to wipe the slate clean, to look to the future not the past. To really be in charge without board or middle-management interference.

Jose Mourinho, Martin O'Neill and Fabio Capello fit the bill. They're not available and would never be under the current circumstances. Who'd work for Ashley? The severance clause would be the most important part of the contract!

Keegan's Long Walkout of Fiefdom is hardly going to encourage a top coach to replace him. It might even leave Dennis Wise in the boxseat for the hotseat.

Still, as indigestible as that might be to every Toon fan, at least it would simplify the lousiest management structure in the Premier League.

And until they sort that out, there's no future for Newcastle United at all.

Scolari shows even the big boys walk a tightrope to success

In their hurry-scurry to ship in one of the world's best-known coaches from his high-profile assignment with Portugal, Chelsea forgot to tell Big Phil Scolari that Frank Lampard may not be a part of his squad!

And if you were Peter Kenyon, under pressure from The Big Man to tempt the Brazilian to Stamford Bridge, why would you tell him of the near two-year impasse between the club and Lampard's advisors? Hence, Scolari's comments in his first news conference that the freescoring midfielder would be part of his team and his vice-captain.

Chelsea is after all about the desires of its owner, irrespective of the skills and experience of the coaches and executives below him.

Ditto Manchester United - except for one major difference, the power lies in the manager's office - not at board level. The Glazer's have geared United SO MASSIVELY that the team's on-field success disguises the delicate state of the business itself.

Have Arsenal got much in the locker if Arsene Wenger moved on? well, their board's always been supportive of him and they've shown vision and guile to build the new stadium - but there's no succession plan at all. I mean they can't even be sure of who'll be on their board by the end of this season.

And Liverpool, they've got no money and their new stadium plans are beset with spiralling construction costs and they've not even started building it yet. It's looking unsure at Anfield.

And that's the so-called big four.

All which points to one thing: never has there been a better opportunity for one of the Pretender Clubs behind the big four to challenge for silverware and Champions League qualification.

In these times of the Credit Crunch, increased raw material costs and job losses among the fans, there's a window of opportunity for those clubs with a tighter wage bill, a low-profile supportive board and a continuity of team management, to compete on the pitch in games - and off the pitch in transfers and youth policy.

Step forward Spurs, Everton, Villa and Pompey to not just close the gap to the big 4 but one of them to make the big-time this season!

More competition in the Premier League? - that's got to be a change for good.