What on earth is Rooney doing?

Wayne Rooney's declared a unilateral breakdown of his relationship with Sir Alex Ferguson, to the point that he's prepared to leave Old Trafford in January.

Rooney, who more than anyone else has been Fergie's chief talisman since the departure of Roy Keane, will seek new employers and refuse to sign an extension to his existing contract.

It all started a few days ago when Wazza announced he'd been fully fit all along - despite Sir Alex claiming injury was the reason for his non selection recently.

Hence, he exposed his manager as a liar. You only have to ask Keane, David Beckham and Jaap Stam about crossing Fergie. You do so at the expense of your United career. That's what.

Sir Alex knows full well the maxim that every streetwise boss lives by - players lose managers their jobs.

Turns out Fergie was punishing his wayward star for his night with a prostitute while his wife Coleen was pregnant. Fergie likes settled, married men. He believes they give their best to Manchester United.

Only at the end of last season, he'd proudly announced that Rooney was his "main man" - even when Cristiano Ronaldo was outperforming him during the Portugeezer's heady days at Old Trafford.

And in his most unusual Champions League conference ever, Sir Alex was clearly dumbfounded, nay nonplussed by his star striker's determination to get away. There's no one better at managing young men, dealing with egos, engendering loyalty - and ultimately getting them to play at their optimum potential than the United boss.

So I'm amazed at the 24-year-old's thickheadedness. I knew his greatest asset was football; his talents limited in pretty much every other sphere.

But I didn't realise he could put his foot through everything of value in his life in such a short span of time.

It's unclear what the status of his marriage is after that prostitute story. And it's the other key relationship in his life that appears to have been ruined as well.

If the rumours about his spat become a split with Fergie, then he really is a dumb footballer of the first water.

Wazza's doing a Gazza. He's about to press the self-destruct button.

If Rooney has any sense at all, he'll walk into the manager's office and apologise (and Fergie's said he'll have him back), then get on with restoring form to his lacklustre game.

If United are forced to sell him in the January window, then they should get as much money as they can for a player with twenty months left on his current deal.

And in the shifting sands of the current marketplace: moving powerbases and changing regulations, Rooney could be set for a huge fall from grace. The biggest loser of all.

Step back from the brink, you idiot. Apologise to Fergie and repay the only debt you owe the footballing public: a return to your best form for United and England.