They think it's all over... it is now, Ceefax

You couldn't run Teletext off an internal aerial

We've not used it for years - the technology has been totally superseded by Twitter, social media and apps.

What was black, white and read all over? Page 101, of course!

BBC Ceefax drew its very, very last breath in October 2012. Digital Switchover is complete leaving football fans with happy memories of sedentary indoor fun with occasional bouts of very sudden jumping up in celebration.

38 years of news, weather plus a selection of pages and elevator music on BBC1 overnight, has met its Waterloo. 

But the fan experience is just incomplete without having "watched" at least one of your team's games via the scrolling pages.

That's better! Look, a hat-trick from Matty Fryatt!

Ten games spread across three pages, all lasting twenty seconds each, how many of us hung onto every turn of the page, especially as it got closer to full time?

Would Platty get that late goal to break the Villa stalemate at home to Palace? Could Thorstvedt hold on against the mighty Anfield onslaught of Rush and Aldridge?

Oh, the agony of conceding a late goal - oh, the thrill of seeing a late winner flash up! Like the turning of a blackjack card in the casino: it's in, we've won! How many of you freely admit jumping round your front room at a Teletext update?

Almost as good as being there - and no queue to get out the ground in the cold either.

No, Teletext was the perfect media to exacerbate the pain of the football fan's lot and the Soccermongery flag is at half-mast in honour of our ever-dependable BBC pal, Ceefax!

listen to ‘So farewell then, Ceefax! ’ on Audioboo

England home and hosed after Warsaw rain!

What it's all about. Oh hang on, it's Terry again!

When qualification for the next World Cup is complete, England may well look back at their 1-all draw in Poland as a good point earned.

Because the rain-delayed match proved very difficult - as did our ability to capture our best form. Jonny looks back at that plus the sometimes excruciating, but mostly entertaining television coverage!

listen to ‘England home and hosed after Warsaw rain!’ on Audioboo

Pole-axed England grab rain-delayed draw

The doubtful chemistry between Keano and Adrian

England's World Cup qualifier in Poland descended into farce as the match in Warsaw was delayed by one very big waterlogged day.

It was totally avoidable too as the Poles decided not to close the stadium roof before it was too late.

For most England fans who couldn't travel, ITV1 was our link to the action. And considering it was four men over the age of 40 looking out the window at a rainy day, the coverage wasn't entirely boring!

As it became more and more apparent the game was a wash out, Gabriel Clarke brought us the politicking behind closed doors, as the two FA's fought over when exactly the game should be played.

At one point, the Poles continued to want to play on the night, determinedly keeping their kits on despite the rain. Then when that was done, November was the fallback position.

England said, "No, we’ve got a friendly in Sweden then."

Here's one we prepared earlier. How the roof shoulda been!

In the end, the game was rescheduled for 4 o'clock the following day.

Lee Dixon joked he'd be wearing approximately the same suit, shirt and tie as before! But the thing we all waited to see was the simmering volcano that is - Roy Keane!

I longed for one more joke where Adrian Chiles used human landmine Keane as its butt. It was raining, Keane was bored, Keane was steaming.

I love watching Keane's punditry. There's that tension while he's listening to the others and a Joe Pesci Goodfellas crackle when he delivers his.

At one point, Chiles ran out of things to say. "Where shall we take the discussion now?". If Adrian had used his radio experience, he could've plugged viewers for rain-based footballers, Ally McCLOUD, Pepe RAINA!

So the game went on (along with the roof, coinciding with the sunniest day in Warsaw) and we had to work very hard for a point.

England top Group H as Wayne Rooney gave us a half-time advantage before a Polish onslaught resulted in a second-period leveller.

Hodgson's men lead Montenegro by a point, but by the time we play them away, they could top the group as they play both Moldova and San Marino leading upto England's game.

Not plain-sailing - an appropriate metaphor for the rain, but England can look back at Warsaw as a good point.

No sweat England ease past San Marino

Rooney's penalty

Oxlade-Chamberlain's 1st goal

Jonny Gould reports live from Wembley as England made easy work of San Marino.

But could they have scored more against the joint worst team in world football?

Jonny reports at the final whistle.

listen to ‘No sweat England ease past San Marino ’ on Audioboo

San Marino want a piece of Wazza too.